Urban Legends, Semi-Bunked

[digitaldiscipline]

Legend:

Good vodka is nothing more than better-filtered bad vodka

Test procedure:

Procure 500ml of Bad Vodka - Gordon's Deluxe
Procure Charcoal Filter (Pur, 1 qt)

All but 50ml of the GS were poured through the Pur filter three times over the course of three days and refrigerated continuously.  The control sample remained sealed in the original (plastic, natch) bottle, and was also refrigerated.

Before sampling, the tester's mouth was rinsed with Ocean Spray Cranberry Fruit Tea.

The control sample was, in a word, vile.  But, to go into greater detail, it came on like a turpentine enema, had the body of a flyblown yak, and finished like last year's Miss Bukkake Albania.

After a rinse with OSCFT, the test was sampled.

It won't be mistaken for Grey Goose or Ultimat, but it might pass for Absolut - the brutal come-on was all but entirely eliminated, and the body and finish, while still approximating a hundred and twenty grit sanding belt, were markedly improved.

Verdict:

The filter effect was far from negligible, and for those readers with a taste for non-shite vodka and on a slimmer budget, the $20 Pur filtering pitcher will pay for itself in less than three liters' worth of production.  Additional filtration may yield superior results; further experiments into the law of diminishing returns may be undertaken at a future date.

Comments

Addendum

[axissilverhand.livejournal.com]

This procedure will make "Popov" drinkable, and at $6.50/L the investment was less than the Absolute I was trying to emulate.

HOWEVER:

This will NOT help Gin, Whisky, or anything flavoured.

Good on ya, Sir!

[helcat.livejournal.com]

But, to go into greater detail, it came on like a turpentine enema, had the body of a flyblown yak, and finished like last year's Miss Bukkake Albania.

*howls*

[ashbet]

:D

Only you . . .

Glad to hear that your efforts obtained a positive result ;)

-- A <3

Re: Addendum

[ladysoleil.livejournal.com]

wow. I thought nothing but extreme drunkenness would make Popov drinkable. I mean, it cannot possibly be a coincidence that it basically comes in a lighter fluid bottle, can it.

I can report that while it's evil to drink, it makes a Jack O Lantern burn real nice. (do not try this in your house. you will have scorched wallpaper. do not ask me why I know this.)

[geekers.livejournal.com]

Too much effort, and still not good enough result for me, however. Bad vodka is one of only a small handful of alcoholic bevvies that can make me ill. It's worth the bling to just purchase the better quality!

[dark-angel-nic.livejournal.com]

Why thank you sir!

[izzy23.livejournal.com]

If you weren't already on my friends list, I would add you for this.

[sketch-says.livejournal.com]

you're not on my friends list and I added you for this ;-)

[etcet.livejournal.com]

ack! jax weirdos! ;-)