*snerk*

[digitaldiscipline]

http://bloggasm.com/hilarious-quotes-from-fundamentalist-christian-chat-rooms

Folks, that right there... that's the distilled essence of the good shit.

Comments

[serpentstar.livejournal.com]

6. You are banned. You are not a Christian for Christians don’t accuse brothers and sisters in Christ of being non-Christian.

Only a Sith deals in absolutes!

[ladysoleil.livejournal.com]

The original list has some winners, too:

"[Would you please tell us what your scientific qualifications (for evaluating evolution) are? What is your profession?]

My qualification is I'm a God-fearing college dropout redneck hick landlord who goes after darwinism with freaking vengeance....and I just happen to have the truth on my side."

Niiiiice.

Whoa. . . just, whoa.

[mitejen.livejournal.com]

How about the post rapture file?

Including Daddy's ATM and Credit card pins, where the guns are and how to load them.

'My son's girlfriend keeps leaving dirty magazines full of naked men under his bed.'

Classic.

[ginnyland.livejournal.com]

wow.
just wow. those are awesome

[lil-m-moses.livejournal.com]

Awesomely terrifying! These are the people who elected Shrubya!

[megiddo-lj.livejournal.com]

#5 is made of Awesomesauce

"We know the only true translation is the 1600’s version in English."

OBJECTION!

[emzebel.livejournal.com]

Sustained!

WTH is wrong with these people? I'm sensing a theme. :P

Praise Allah!

[emzebel.livejournal.com]

As an atheist, I was awfully fond of this one:

"No, everyone is born Christian. Only later in life do people choose to stray from Jesus and worship satan instead. Atheists have the greatest "cover" of all, they insist they believe in no god yet most polls done and the latest research indicates that they are actually a different sect of Muslims."

[ladysoleil.livejournal.com]

There was another doozy on the list that put forth that the Bible was in English first and then translated into Hebrew, so if there are errors, the Hebrew version is mistranslated.

Umm. No.

[cerisefemme.livejournal.com]

The really scary part is that this list actually sounds like quite a few fundies that I have talked to!

[ivy]

I got thrown out of a Christian bookstore once for asking for a Latin Vulgate Bible, with the classic line, "IF ENGLISH WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR JESUS IT SHOULD BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!". She was all mad that I couldn't stop laughing.

O.O

[bitogoth.livejournal.com]

*scrubs brain with acid*

[ashbet]

Those are fucking fabulous. Thank you.

-- A ^_^