Attention: Universe

Stop inflicting negative shit on my friends. This is Deeply Uncool, Profoundly Obnoxious, and Mighty Untoward.

As soon as I figure out how to Chuck Norris my foot at right angles to reality, I'm gonna kick the universe in the nads on behalf of all'a y'all.

Need a laugh?

Listen to Yours Truly extoll the virtues of financial services offered by his company in his finest Corporate Jim accent.

Who are you freaks?

Yo, lurkers, those of you who read but never comment - who the fuck are ya, and what brought ya here?

[the idea, but not the gentility, culled from cavalorn]